Performing at home.

sometimes motherhood and wifehood duties (all while 8 months pregnant) make me tired and a little grumpy. it's true! i get grumpy! last week and i was "getting through" the days and it at the end of the day i was sad. so friday morning as me and the boys were taking our morning rinse while blasting general conference talks, the words i was listening to made perfect sense. the speaker was talking about the music of the gospel- so good for a dancer!

"...when we can hear the music ourselves, we must try our best to perform it in our homes. It is not something that can be forced or compelled. “No power or influence can or ought to be maintained by virtue of the priesthood”—or by virtue of being the dad or the mom or the biggest or the loudest—“only by persuasion, by long-suffering, by gentleness and meekness, … by love unfeigned; [and] by kindness”

Why would these attributes lead to increasing power and influence in a home? Because they are the attributes that invite the Spirit of the Holy Ghost. They are the attributes that tune our hearts to the music of the gospel. When they are present, the dance steps will be performed more naturally and joyfully by all of the dancers in the family, without the need for threats or intimidation or compulsion."

 so today i tried harder to be patient and enjoy the music i'm hearing right now, with my two (almost three) little buddies.

and this is me with 4 weeks to go! we can't wait to meet you, babe!

xo

happy birthday, henry!

this was while i was making brownies for your birthday. you and charles were making "chocolachieee!"

my dear henry,

just wanted to write you a little love letter. my mama heart has been so full the past two days. you turned 3! i cannot believe how fast time is flying by. i remember when i was pregnant with you, and i had just come out of a meeting telling the juilliard dance faculty that i was expecting. i was walking down the staircase to meet daniel outside. my throat had a lump in it, and my cheeks were still wet from crying. i was completely afraid, but somehow had enough faith to let the lord guide my life. as i was opening the heavy black door from the staircase into the lobby, i could almost hear your little voice. "mom, i am here. we are going to do this together." i felt your strong, valiant spirit lifting me higher. i will never forget that moment.

and now today as i sit here and write this, my face is wet with tears of gratitude for the opportunity to be your mother. i have been taught by my mother that raising children is the most divine and glorious calling we have. and i know with all my being that this is true. oh i love our life, little henry. and i am pretty certain you love it, too. you are our happy, pure, protective, smart and radiant little boy. your dad and i are more and more amazed by you every single day. so proud of the person you're becoming.

every morning you sneak into our bed and cuddle up next to me, forehead to forehead. as soon as daddy's alarm goes off- you are awake, around 6:30 am. "mommy, da sun up!" we snuggle a little more and then you always say "mom, les go make some dinner" today you wanted toast with jam, oatmeal, and chicken and rice. you got the first two;).

you and charles are so funny together. after bath time today you and charles were playing on our bed while i got ready. after a few minutes i heard you say in your little soft voice, "charly, wanna get down? i help you! come 'ere." then i hear a huge thunk followed by two screaming boys. i ran in and find you holding charles, his little legs wrapped around your waist and his arms tightly around your neck. he had completely trusted you to help him off our tall bed and you had taken the fall for the both of you as you lay on your back flat on the ground with charly on top of you.. charles was a little too heavy;)

i love you with all my beating heart. and so does daddy and of course charles, too. so happy your ours.